Better Days

Yesterday we received a call from the actual Dr. and not Assistant Pat which never means good news. Turns out she did not have cheery news to spread. We lost the pregnancy. We are very sad and know that it is a good thing my body aborted something it was not supposed to have and I know we will be able to have kids in the future but that does not change the fact that we are sad. Being sad makes you tired - I did not want to get out of bed today to go see the Dr. either.
We got to the Dr. office this morning and could tell they were preparing us for bad news. We sat outside the Doctor's office while she prepared her notes with the nurse then called us in. She showed us there were definitely 2 sacs and 1 is definitely not good. They are 99.99% sure the other one is bad too but I have to go get another sonogram tomorrow AM so we can be 100% sure before I make an appointment for surgery.
I have to be put to sleep and I am scared. I have never been scared for surgery before or really getting anything like this done. Sure, I get nervous but not scared. I have never been put under before and I do not react to medication well. I have a very sensitive system so I don't take pain medication or even cold medication for that matter. I am an Advil person or it will go away on it's own.
I know it will be okay and I have a very good Dr. but I am just dreading this. The surgery will only take about 30 minutes and then Jason will drive me home and I will sleep. We are not sure when the surgery will be but hopefully it will be by the end of this week or right after x-mas.